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Is Bob Malm mentally ill? I don’t know the answer to that question, but believe there are factors that suggest the answer is yes. Among them:

  • Bob’s seeming need for adulation, combined with constant efforts to secure more.
  • His focus on power and control, and his use of forceful diction to try to create an impression of power/authority.
  • His focus on superficial image and appearance.
  • His carefully hidden insecurity.
  • His ability to present a guileless exterior, while exhibiting behavior behind the scenes that is vile, vicious, and vindictive.
  • His seeming need to live up to parental and other expectations.
  • His apparent treatment of his children as an extension of himself.
  • His sometimes over-the-top rages when he perceives himself to be criticized, or those close to him.
  • His profound resistance to supervising staff and performing other essential components of his job.
  • His belief that he’s a great supervisor and priest, when facts suggest otherwise.
  • His stated beliefs that he is invincible, and doesn’t need others.
  • His strong verbal skills.
  • His lack of real empathy for others.
  • His often practiced/rehearsed conduct, combined with oddly “flat” behavior when he cannot play a rehearsed role.
  • His refusal to address conflict.
  • His professed religious beliefs, which often stand in marked contrast to his conduct.
  • His dismissive remarks about his wife and others whom he claims to care about.
  • His seemingly shallow emotions.
  • His ability to lie as needed, making stuff up as needed to suit his purposes.
  • His lack of a notion of objective truth/reality.
  • His projection of his own attributes on others.
  • His willingness to lie and commit perjury, while loudly decrying my assertion that he has done so, all while ignoring written evidence of his deceit.
  • His apparent inability to see any conflict between his professed values and his conduct.
  • His willingness to ignore church policies and requirements when it suits him.
  • His ability to manipulate the perceptions of others.
  • His increasing paranoia, including his belief that he is pursued by “domestic terrorists.”
  • His becoming disoriented in his own home, resulting in a serious fall and hospitalization in 2014.
  • His tendency to address issues/conflict through manipulation, versus open dialogue.
  • His unwillingness to take responsibility for his actions.
  • His seeming belief that he is special or unique and should only associate with others who are special.
  • His deep-seated but carefully hidden prejudices on certain issues.
  • His seeming tendency to cultivate those who are wealthier or may otherwise confer perceived status on him.
  • His dismissive attitude towards those who may have nicer belongings than him.
  • His irrational conduct towards me and indifference to the damage it is causing to Grace Church and its members.
  • His apparent belief that criticizing his conduct is somehow abusive or illegal.
  • His stated belief that he can use the judicial system as a way to discipline former church members.