Showing posts with label Bob Malm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bob Malm. Show all posts

Saturday, January 25, 2020

Bob Malm: Club Protest Membership Countdown


By virtue of trying to shutdown criticism by going to court with his facially false claims that he had been threatened, pseudo-priest Bob Malm and Grace Episcopal signed up for the two-year membership at Club Protest. No refunds, late payments result in an extension of membership. And his decision to include Mike in his vendetta, his multiple lies in court, and his efforts to subpoena a dying woman, all mean Bob gets the special VIP add-on package — my online presence will continue ad infinitum. That’s right, Dysfunctional Bob gets the lifetime virtual membership. Hey, Bob always did think he was special. Well, he’s right.

So, this countdown timer doesn’t mark the countdown to an end to open hostilities. But it does mark the payout of Dysfunctional Bob’s basic Club Protest membership.That said, I have always believed in under-promise, over-deliver, so I will no doubt extend Bob’s basic membership well beyond his original contract. And Grace Episcopal gets in on the action, for free.

Hey, if he behaves, maybe we can even spot Bob some core body fitness tips. Heaven knows he’s been looking rather well-fed in recent years. And it fits — Grace Church aka St. Dysfunction is looking a whole lot leaner and meaner these days.

See you at Dysfunction Junction aka Malm Square(d)!

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Monday, November 18, 2019

Bob Malm’s Statement Against Interest Underscores His Questionable Veracity

Here is a good reminder of Bob Malm’s manipulative, dishonest conduct.

At a time when Bob was claiming he needed a protective order to deal with threats from me — threats that he refused to specify, even when ordered by the court to do so — Bob was making statements against interest, including this email to the Episcopal bishop of Virginia, in which he says that his wife and one of his daughters “give this [conflict] so much more attention than it deserves.”

Later, more evidence of questionable veracity on Bob Malm’s part.




Saturday, November 16, 2019

This Christmas, Remember the Meaning of Christmas

This Christmas, remember the true meaning of the holiday: Compassion, kindness, love.

Boycott Grace Episcopal, the clergy perjury parish, where clergy lie under oath with impunity and it’s okay to drag the dying into court.



Reflections on the Diocesan Annual Convention, Inclusion, and Integrity




With the 225th diocesan annual convention winding down later today, it’s fitting to reflect on lessons learned from protesting outside the meeting and related questions.

What is most notable about the convention is that, with all those dog collars roaming around, not one person asked me about my protests. Not one. Yes, there were a ton of hits on the blog, and a few people took my photo, but nothing beyond that.

The lack of communication is telling. As a modern-day metaphoric leper at the gate, my situation underscores one of the great myths about the church, which is that it is inclusive. It is not. Most often, it’s just indifferent. That’s sad, because it directly contradicts Jesus’ message about “as you have done to the least of these, so also have you done unto me.”

If nothing else, when I have seen demonstrators, persons with car problems or other issues outside my church, I’ve always made it a point to welcome them in. Many say no, fearing that the invite is a recruitment effort. But quite a few also have found that, even if the church doesn’t meet a need for a spiritual home, it’s at least a safe place to shelter from the vicissitudes of life.

My inclination would also be to learn more and see if there is anything I could do to help. If nothing else, I’d be concerned about the church’s reputation, and eager to do what I can to at least soften the conflict.

(It’s also amusing to see Episcopalians pretending they don’t see you. It’s like a Monty Python movie:

“It’s a bloody protester.”

“No, you daft bastard, it’s bloody terrorist. Why, he’s even carrying a sign.”

“Blimey, and I thought he was a protestor!”

“Well, I can’t see him. Can you?”)

That also points to underlying integrity issues with the church. How can the church be healthy and whole when it ignores problems literally at its doorstep? Hardly loving, liberating or life-giving.

That also raises the more tactical question: Will the diocese and its attorneys have the integrity to admit that Bob Malm committed perjury? Or will they try to defend conduct that is utterly indefensible?

If past results are any indication of future performance, they will do their utmost to avoid addressing the elephant in the room.

Friday, November 15, 2019

Breaking News: Grace Episcopal aka the Clergy Perjury Parish, Susan Goff, and DioVA Finally Respond

Breaking news: I have just received notice that DioVA, Susan Goff, and Grace Episcopal, the clergy perjury parish, are represented by counsel. Predictably enough, counsel for the defendants is objecting to the subpoenas previously issued by the court.

In the meantime, I have suggested to counsel that we stipulate that there is no evidence to support Bob Malm’s assertion, made under oath, in writing, while advised by church legal counsel. In other words, that Bob Malm committed perjury.

We’ll see what happens.




Thursday, November 14, 2019

Grace Episcopal Alexandria: “Growing and Flourishing”? Not so Much, Jason

If losing 1/3 of your pledging units is Jason Roberson’s definition of “growing and flourishing,” I’d hate like hell to see his definition of “declining!”

Time to tell the truth, Jason. People deserve to hear the truth.

Grace Episcopal, the clergy perjury parish






Monday, November 11, 2019

Here’s How Grace Episcopal Talks About Victims of Church Abuse

Before you pledge this fall, consider whether this sort of conduct by Bob Malm and Sugarland Chiow reflects your values, and those of Christianity. (Screen cap from their objection to my withdrawal of my appeal.)

Sorry folks—there’s nothing Christian about this sort of behavior. Nothing.

Maybe the church should make copies available in the Malm narthex, just so people know what they are getting into. Literally and figuratively.


Monday, November 4, 2019

Breaking News: New Site

With traffic to this blog now steady at more than 200 hits a day, and the milestone of 100,000 hits coming up soon, it’s becoming increasingly clear that it’s time to upgrade to a more powerful platform. With that in mind, the relaunched blog is now running alongside this one at www.gracealex.us.

For now, selected content will appear on both blogs. Existing domain names, including www.bobmalm.com, will point to the new platform sometime in the next few weeks.

Grace Episcopal, the Clergy Perjury Parish

Sunday, November 3, 2019

Friday, November 1, 2019

Updated Information on Lawsuit Against Grace Episcopal, the Clergy Perjury Parish

Updated information confirms service of process on Bishop Susan Goff, the Episcopal Diocese of Virginia, and Grace Episcopal Alexandria.

It will be interesting to see how the good Christians at Grace Church respond to my request for documentation that mom “time after time” makes appointments with perjuring priest Bob Malm. Will they tell the truth? Will they admit that Malm committed perjury?

Somehow, I don’t see Goff, Sugarland Chiow, or any of that crowd acting in an honorable way.

Grace Episcopal, the clergy perjury parish.






Saturday, October 26, 2019

Second Lawsuit


Steps are now under way to file a second lawsuit against Grace Episcopal Church, the Episcopal Diocese of Virginia, Susan Goff, and several other parties, including multiple church staff, volunteers, and independent contractors. I anticipate the suit will be filed in Pennsylvania and will involve multiple plaintiffs. Several of the defendants will be added once the initial suit is filed.

Not a great time for Planet Malm

Wednesday, October 23, 2019

With Grace Church Headed to Court, will Bob Malm Man Up and Admit His Perjury? Doubtful.

Let’s face it. Bob Malm’s good at going after dying women, bullying persons like Mike recently received into The Episcopal Church, ignoring the canons, and making excuses why, after 25 years of his lazy backside, Grace Church still didn’t have the finance manual required by church canons. That said, he wasn’t so good at explaining the thousands of dollars in loose cash and stale checks found in the church office. Nor is he good at accepting responsibility for his misconduct.

So do you think Bob will be a man and admit to his perjury prior to the January court date? Doubtful in the extreme.

Maybe Bob should call his purported friends at the Alexandria Police Department (APD) and have a conversation about the Ninth Commandment. Just in case Bob’s not familiar, that’s the one that says, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.” As in Bob’s courtroom perjury.

Or, since he and Susan Goff appear to be pen pals on the subject, maybe she will be kind enough to have that conversation with the police department.

Doubtful on both counts.




Friday, October 18, 2019

Coming Soon: More Grace Church Correspondence

Fun times ahead for Grace Church! I have obtained a trove of emails and phone records pertaining to the church. While I am still wading through my find, I believe some are profoundly damning.

My plan is to begin publishing Monday, with continuing releases throughout the pledge season. Additionally, several will prove helpful in my upcoming litigation against the parish, diocese and others.

Thursday, October 17, 2019

Grace Episcopal’s Website and Transition Issues



One of the first things that should happen in a successful church transition is to formally let go of the old and open the door to the new. Ensuring that this happens normally is the job of the diocesan transition minister working in conjunction with the vestry. But this doesn’t appear to be happening at Grace, particularly apropos the web site. So here are my suggestions for the website, which should have happened shortly after Bob’s farewell,
  1. Assuming the content was appropriate, Bob Malm’s final sermon should have been posted promptly. I raise the issue of appropriateness because some of Bob’s farewell content, including his top-ten lists, was not appropriate, given his reference to the diocese being a challenge. That said, it it important for the departing priest to leave on good terms, and to express her or his support for the transition. Indeed, it is a final act of ministry to the church and its people, and people need time to process and reflect,
  2. The photos of Bob need to go and should be replaced with photos of the people of the church. We don’t need to see Bob with his back to the congregation at the altar, nor the closeup of Bob’s hideous homegrown hair color and terrible transplant. It’s unflattering, and content on the site needs to look forward, not back to the past,
  3. Given that discussions have been happening behind the scenes for some time between the diocese and the vestry, a printed road map of the transition process should already have been posted. It can and should be confined to a high-level summary, but after 30 years of Dysfunctional Bob, few in the parish even remember what happens when there is a transition. This information provides reassurance, particularly since verbal updates during the adult forum often won’t be fully remembered, or will be misunderstood. And there will be plenty of elderly folks and others who can’t make the forum.
  4. It’s time to reverse course and become transparent. Bob and other church “leaders” decided to pull the vestry’s minutes from the site in order to deny me access to information and in order to avoid raising issues with potential lenders for the HVAC project, many of whom would be alarmed at the precipitous decline in pledging units and Sunday attendance, as well as the extent of conflict in th parish. But as Kemp Williams noted in one of his emails, I continue to have full access to data from the parish, and banks aren’t stupid either. So the only thing that a lack of transparency engenders is anxiety among members and additional questions. In other words, you can’t fix the church’s declining fortunes without discussing the issues, and church members have a right to know about these issues. You can’t expect members to just give blindly. And no interim worth having is going to take the gig without fully understanding the. extent of the mess she inherits. Moreover, lack of transparency is both a sign of poor governance and a red flag to anyone considering joining. Budgets, annual reports, minutes, monthly financials, church policies all need to go up on the site.
  5. The website needs to otherwise be current. Signup for foyers and Easter celebrations don’t cut it, folks. The lack of current content and the delay in posting sermons sends a message of a church in trouble,
  6. Someone with an experienced eye needs to go through and assess imagery on the site. The web is becoming more and more visual, and the volume of image searches continues to skyrocket. So why, for instance, are you posting images of the columbarium at night? Hardly helpful. Think spring, think people, think children, think puppies, think happy times at Shrine Mont. Those are the messages you want to send.
  7. As the church develops the content needed for a successful search, it’s important not to pull the usual Grace trick of trying to sweep issues under the rug. Conduct within the parish has been shocking and appalling over the last few years, replete with Bob Malm’s perjury, the church suing its members, trying to drag a terminally ill woman into court, calling other Christians “domestic terrorists,” and bullying innocent family members out of the Christian faith. While much of the damage that has been done is irreparable, coming to terms with these issues and understanding how they fit in with the baptismal covenant and the obligation to repent of one’s sins is essential if the church is to move forward successfully. Personally, I am not sanguine about the church’s ability in this area, particularly given that the diocese does not recognize the importance of these matters, but it still needs to be said. Moreover, given the very public nature of my dispute with Bob Malm and the public court records he has filed, it is appropriate that these issues be addressed publicly, possibly including on the website.
Grace Church, you surely are a mess.




Friday, October 11, 2019

Bob Malm’s Top-Ten Lists: A Seriously Bad Idea



One of Dysfunctional Bob’s final acts as rector was publishing a series of top-ten lists in the church newsletter, Grace Notes. While most of the content is unremarkable at best, there is one aspect that is really troubling.

Before we go to the heart of the matter, let me say this: Someone should have edited these lists. Between irregular punctuation and Bob’s famous Decorative Caps for Important Words That Are Not Proper Nouns, there are issues that don’t reflect well.

More importantly, Bob should not be listing the diocese as one of the top ten challenges ahead for the church. I say that as someone who is unimpressed with the diocese and its leadership. But at the time the article was published, Bob’s role should have been to be supportive of the parish, the diocese, and the people involved. As things stand, the addition of this challenge is far from helpful.

As an aside, the irony is that the diocese may well prove to be a pain in the church’s backside, but not for the reasons Bob may imagine. Left to wade through the dysfunctional, clueless mess that Bob leaves behind, no doubt the diocese will have to tread carefully. Even so, there is little doubt that some parishioners will be offended, for one cannot buy into Planet Malm, only later to discover the illusory nature of one’s investment, without at least some angst.

Still worse, the reality is that many who are offended by Bob Malm’s narcissistic behavior already have pulled the plug on Grace. Yes, some will come back, but those who remain are by and large those who have either turned a blind eye to the toxic nature of the church, or who just don’t get it. Either way, many are in for a rude shock when they realize the depth and breadth of problems at the church.

I surely do not envy whoever is unfortunate enough to become interim.

Look Before You Leap: 12 Questions Prospective Interims Should Ask



If you’re a prospective interim rector at Grace Church and reading this, good for you. 

I mean it—the fact that you’re doing your homework is a good sign. 

A key observation from my years at Grace Church is that, like many toxic organizations, words don’t mean what you think they do. For example, you and I may think that “pastoral care” has one meaning, but look behind the curtain and it has come to mean something very different at Grace Church. That’s not surprising, as problematic clergy typically shift the narrative over time.

So, since my conflict with Bob Malm and the parish in many ways both illustrates and underscores the problems at the church, here are some questions you might ask of diocesan officials and vestry members before you take the plunge. And while the answers to some are damning indeed, and you may thus be tempted to discount the answers, I encourage you to really dig in and understand this information. My belief is that, if you do, you will have a fighting chance of fixing the mess that is Grace Church.

Here we go:
  1. Did Bob Malm or the vestry ever discuss these issues one-on-one with Eric and his family? If so, what happened?
  2. In the church’s legal pleadings, Bob Malm and the church assert that Eric is mentally ill. How did they reach this conclusion? Did they ever discuss it with Eric? If they believed that Eric was mentally ill, did they ever attempt to arrange care for Eric?
  3. In the court documents that Malm filed, one of the reasons he cited under oath for his belief that her blog is really Eric’s work is that Eric’s mother, Sigrid Yahner, or someone claiming to be her, repeatedly made appointments with Malm and no-showed. Eric claims this is a lie/perjury. Can I see records that show this really happened?
  4. The diocese stated that it would not investigate Eric’s claim that Malm committed perjury unless the latter faced criminal charges. Is that normal policy for allegations of misconduct involving potentially criminal behavior? If not, why did the diocese take this approach?
  5. Early in the conflict, Eric asked the diocese to mediate the conflict. The diocese dismissed this request outright. Why?
  6. Eric claims that Bob Malm instructed church staff to exclude him and his husband from the parish and has an email that appears to show that this is the case. Yet the vestry’s talking points say Eric left on his own. Which is true and how do we know?
  7. Some of Jeffery Chiow’s language in his court documents is over the top, like referring to the conflict as a case of “domestic terrorism,” calling Eric a “serial liar,” and more. Why did the church take this approach? Do you think it was helpful? Similarly, Malm refers to Eric in email to the diocese as “sick,” “twisted,” and “dysfunctional.” Did anyone at the diocese ever object to this? If not, why not?
  8. Vestry minutes show that the vestry knew and approved of Bob’s efforts to take Eric to court. What was the vestry’s role in this matter? How did it effect oversight?
  9. At one point, Eric alleged that the church had illegally misused memorial donations, yet the diocese refused to get involved. Is this normal practice when allegations of misuse of funds come to the attention of the diocese?
  10. The diocese states in writing that these matters were investigated and resolved long ago and that the diocese fully supports Bob Malm. Who was the investigator? Is that person professionally trained as an investigator? Were the allegations of misuse of funds ever addressed by an auditor or law enforcement? Why does the diocese say the matter was resolved when the conflict clearly continues?
  11. In light of the tremendous damage this conflict has caused the parish and the larger church, is it still the diocese’s position that it fully supports Bob Malm? Has bishop Goff ever sat down with Eric to try to understand this conflict?
  12. From your perspective, can this conflict be resolved? What would it take to do so? Are there lessons learned from this conflict? How do you see this conflict affecting the parish a year from now? Ten years from now?